John Stroman

It has been a week since my father-in-law went home to be with the Lord. I have reflected on many things in the last 2 weeks. some have asked me to put some of the thoughts and words that I spoke at his funeral into a format that others could access. The following are some of what I shared last Tuesday afternoon.

There are many things that I learned from my father-in-law. I learned of his love for the Lord, his love for his family, and his love for the Church.

For those of you who know me well, you know that I don’t intimidate easily. But, I will admit today that John intimidated me at first. He was everything that I wanted to be. He was successful, he was a leader in the church and he had a truly great family. I was brought into the family. I was introduced to some truly great and Godly men who mentored me and showed me what it is to be a man of God. Men like John Stroman, Paul Freese, Stan Bowers, George Gressett, Dave Hodsdon, Lowell Clyburn, and Bill Searcy. They are almost all gone now. You will hear from one of those men (Stan Bowers) in just a few minutes.

So I offer this advice to you young men, young husbands, young fathers – find yourself a mentor. Find a man like John Stroman to talk to and learn from. Many have had the privilege of having John as a mentor. I was privileged to have him as a father-in-law.

But I learned another thing about John. I also learned about his love of asking questions. He would question the referee when his beloved Washington Redskins came out on the wrong side of the little yellow rag. I am sure he asked last night what happened to the Redskins? (Redskins and Cowboys on MNF, Sept 26, 2011)

He would ask many kinds of questions. Some of them would, quite frankly, exasperate and embarrass me from time to time. For instance, he would sometimes take me golfing an then ask the pro shop for a discount over and above the coupon that he was already trying to use. He would often ask a waitress for something obscure or not on the menu. He would smile that wry smile and see what they would say.

He would often turn and ask me very pointed questions. Some of them made me uncomfortable. He would ask me about my career plans and choices. He would ask me about some of the financial decisions I was making. And although he did not always agree with my decisions and choices, he always loved and supported me.

I think that I learned the power of the question from John. I learned that you often get more in a tense situation by asking questions than by making statements. Maybe it was all of that IBM sales training. Maybe it was just the wisdom gained from many years of living and learning. But I watched him many times as he applied the technique of asking questions as we sat on church boards together. I would want to shout out the obvious solution. John would choose to patiently ask probing questions until everyone could see the value of the solution that he somehow could see intuitively.

I know that if John were here today he would have at least one or two questions for us all.

He would ask is everyone rejoicing in their hearts today with him?

And he would ask if each of you knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that you knew Jesus the way that John knew Jesus. And if you didn’t, he would ask if you would like to know the Jesus that he knew.

But if you do know Jesus in a real and personal way, he would say what he used to the girls every Sunday morning from the bottom of the stairs . . . Vamanos! Let’s go!

Let’s celebrate the life of John Stroman and get on with living life the way that he lived it.