Tut-tut, it looks like rain

Christopher Robin says that phrase as he walks around the tree with his umbrella raised.  He and Pooh are trying to fool some bees.  Pooh is after the honey and Christopher Robin is trying to distract the bees.  But he is predicting a rain storm that never comes.

I love Winnie the Pooh and grew up reading the books and listening to Maurice Evans read the books on records played on Mom and Dad's console stereo.

God makes a rain prediction to Noah in Genesis 6.  God says,

I am going to bring floodwaters on the earth to destroy all life under the heavens, every creature that has the breath of life in it. Everything on earth will perish.

But here is the part that I am constantly amazed by.  Noah began building the ark long before it started to rain.  And it may have been many, many years before the flood.  In fact, it may have been many years.

Here is what we know.  Noah was around 500 years old when God told him to build it.  And he was around 600 years old when he entered the ark.  So, assuming Noah began shortly after he was commanded to build it, it may have taken up to 100 years.  The Bible doesn't provide that level of detail.  But I have to imagine it would take a 500 year old man and his three sons a very long time to build a boat the size of the ark.

But he did build it.  He built it in the middle of a desert.  He built it without ever experiencing rain like he would one day when he entered the ark.  What an amazing thought.  The world had never seen rain and floods like they were going to see.

He built that ark on faith.  And that faith provided safety for not just him.  But also his wife, his sons, and his sons' wives.  Noah's obedience made it possible for others to live.

Does anyone see Noah's response and actions as a model for us as husbands and fathers?

What if he had waited until he started seeing the dark clouds gathering on the horizon?

I am just talking out loud here, but I think it would have been too late.

By the way, it's supposed to rain here tomorrow.


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Over the line

Not many things bug me.

Well, that's not true. There are a lot of things that bug me. And one of those things that bothers me is the way that people park their cars. It bugs me when they park too close to the line. And it really bugs me when they park over the line. Because if you don't stop this, the next thing you know you will have chaos! Chaos, I say!

And do you know why?

It's because when they park over the line, it makes me go over the line. And I don't like to be over the line. In fact I mumble under my breath or mutter to my wife about all of the goofy people that can't even park their cars.

Then one day the other day it dawned on me. What if the guy's car that I am looking at was forced to park over the line in my space because the guy next to him was over the line. And then it dawned on me again. What if the other guy had to park over the line because another guy was over the line.

I realized I was being just a wee bit judgmental. Ok. I was being a lot judgmental.

But this observation pointed something out to me in a profound way. It became clear that what I do and the decisions that I make have an impact outside of my own little self.

What do you suppose are the implications of that realization? What impact does that make on decisions and actions?

As a dad, I want to keep safe within the lines of God's love and mercy. The last thing I want to do is to force someone else over the line by my careless or selfish actions.  The Bible says in Romans 14:13,

"Therefore let us stop passing judgment on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brother's way."

I am just talking out loud. And I realize we are all accountable for our own decisions. But I would never want to be a stumbling block to anyone. I think I will make extra sure that I am keeping it between the lines.

I'm not just living for the here and now . . .

. . .  I'm living for the there and then.

These are the catchy lyrics of a southern gospel song by The Stevens Family.  I am a big fan of southern gospel.  But I don't really know a whole lot about the Stevens family.  I was just struck by the lyrics and the title of the song.

How many times do we get caught up in the day to day living of our lives that we neglect the eternal implications of our lives and lifestyles.  Many of us have grown up in Sunday School or have gone to Vacation Bible School when we were children.  I bet many of you know the verse, "Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal." -- Matt. 6:19-20

Isn't that verse sort of saying the same thing as the song?  It is to me. 

I am not saying I don't have some living to do here and now.  I do.  I have a family that depends on me.  I have an employer that expects me to show up Monday morning bright and early.  I have bills to pay.  But, like it or not, I am an eternal being.  And I will spend eternity somewhere.  So, I'm not just living for the here and now, I'm living for the there and then.

It's a good thing that I'm talking out loud and not singing out loud.  If you know what I mean.

What Every Man Needs

So, what does every man need?

Is it a wife?  Is it a dog?  Is it a great job?  Is it a big house?  Is it a fast car?

All of those are great.  But, those aren't what is on my mind today.

Every man needs to have some guys to sit around and "smoke and joke" with every once in a while.

Today I had lunch with 3 guys.  It was a great lunch.  Each one of those guys has a very different career from me.  Each one is at a very different place in their family situation than me.  None of them are co-workers.  And none of them go to my church.

So what what made it a great lunch?  It was great because it meets a need that every man has.  And that need is the need to band together once in a while to laugh and tell stories.  I call that "smokin' and jokin'"  Now, the deep dark secret here is that this is one of the ways that men relate to one another.  And we relate on different levels than women.

We laugh with each other and they cry.  We punch each other in the arm and they hug.  Very different.  But it meets a need that I have.  And that is a need to have a band of brothers that are willing to invest in me as I invest in them.  I don't see some of these guys very often.  But it is well worth it when we do get together.

You oughta try it.

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The first duty of love . . .

"The first duty of love is to listen."

Paul Tillich

For those who don't recognize the name, Paul Tillich, he was a German theologian who came to the United States during the rise of the Nazis and prior to WWII.  I don't know that to be all that relevant.  It is just a little background.

My thoughts and questions are about the quote itself.  For instance:

How does this meld with our need to verbally communicate to those around us?
How does this meld with our mate's needs to hear us verbally affirm our love for them?
What if I am a "fixer" by nature?

I saw this quote the other day and it got me to thinking about the implications of active and intense listening to our love relationships.  How would those that we love respond if I took the time to sit and listen to what they are saying to me.  I think I will have to sit for more than the length of the average commercial break during the football game.

I don't really know.  I am just talking out loud.  

But what if it became more than a duty?  What if it became my pleasure?

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I have decided not to wait . . .

I have decided not to wait until it is too late.

Too late for what?

I have decided not to wait until it is too late to tell some folks what I really think about them.

And here is what I think  I think I have been very blessed with some incredible friends throughout my life.  My very first friend that I remember was Billy.  We went to church together in Alexandria, LA.  And we went to school together. Our parents were friends.  As a matter of fact, our parents are still friends today!

I have lost contact with Billy.  But, I will tell you what a great friend Billy was.  He let me switch shoes with him one day in school.  I had very plain lace up shoes.  He had penny loafers!  How cool was that?  So, we switched during school and then we switched back before we went back home at the end of the day so our mother's wouldn't know.

OK, I admit that is not that big of a deal.  But my point is this.  We were friends and he shared what he had with me.  That began a long line of friends that have shared with me and invested in me in ways that I didn't always notice, value, or appreciate at the time.

But as I look back at friends like Cecil, Steve, Ralph, Jeff, Brad, Daren, Dave, and now, guys like Dan, Kurt, Randy, Scott, Rene and Mark, I see a pattern of God's blessings.  These are the guys who are investing in me today.  They make me a better man.  And I have decided not to wait to tell them "Thank you".  I am starting to take the opportunity to tell them now that I love and appreciate them.

Why wait until it is too late?

Carpe thankum!

OK, I just made that up.  But you get the point.

I am going to seize the opportunity to say thank you for being my friend.

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He's got a great "work ethic"

All my life I have lived with a strong desire to be seen as someone who is worthy of his wages.  Most guys my age were raised by dads who worked hard and spent their entire careers with the same company.  That is my case.  After dad got out of the Air Force and married mom, and then he spent his entire career with "the phone company."  And I can count on one hand the number of days he missed work in his entire career.  And I would even have a few fingers left over!  Now that man had a strong work ethic.

I don't think I can ever live up to that.

But I have been thinking about a few other "ethics".  What if there was a "husband ethic"?  What if there was a "father ethic"?  How would I stack up against the measure of a good husband or good father?

Well, most of my work as a father is done.  Both of my children are grown and on their own.  I still have some fathering duties to do as you are never really done as a parent, are you?  And my "grandfathering" is just getting started.

I am still a husband.  And I plan to stay a husband as long as Cathy will have me.  We are enjoying the good years that we have looked forward to our whole lives.  And we are looking forward to the days of retirement where we can travel and enjoy more time together.  I just don't think you ever really retire as a husband or father.

But what about the next generation of men that are just starting their husband and father years?  I think if there is one message that I could deliver to them is that they (or we) need to devote the same level of energy and effort into our roles as husbands and fathers that we devote to our role as employee. 

But it isn't all that easy.  Sometimes we see ourselves simply as "money machines".  We see ourselves as income producers and we think that is our primary function as a man.  Sadly, I think many times we miss the boat here.  And if you ask us if that is how we see ourselves, we may not agree or say that we see ourselves that way.  But our actions don't always line up with our intentions.  We don't mean to ignore our primary roles.  We just get caught up in the day to day activities of getting up and going off to work and bringing home a paycheck.  And we are too tired to be a great husband or great father because we have devoted all our energy to the work place.  Great work ethic.  Not so great husband ethic or father ethic.

Hopefully some wives and mothers will chime in here and comment.  I would be willing to bet that most of them are more concerned about how we "work" with them and our children than how we perform at the office and how much money we bring home.  Ladies, am I right here?

I am a very fortunate man.  I have been blessed with a great role model in my dad and my father-in-law.  They successfully balanced all three of these roles.  They even manged to be active leaders in their local churches for most of their lives.  I try every day to live up to those examples.

But I am back to thinking about that next generation.  I have a son and I have a son-in-law.  My kids have friends that are married and starting families.  I have great friends who have married children.  Some have secular jobs.  Some have jobs as pastor in a local church.  My prayer for them is that they will take on their role as husband and father with the same vigor that they approach their job or their ministry. 

As for me.  I will take the Apostle Paul's words slightly out of context.

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me."

Like I said, it may be slightly out of context.  But you get the point that I am still working at it.

And after all, I am just talking out loud.

A New Blog

I think it is time for me to take a little break from the more serious and theological approach of my other blog.  It has given a voice to many thoughts that I have had and allowed me to dialog with some pretty bright folks.  It has also been a great experience for me and it has made me a better thinker and writer. 

But I am looking for another outlet that allows me to comment on more than just theological pursuits.  I am looking forward to commenting on topics of life, love, family, faith and culture.  Hopefully my facebook friends and followers of my other blog will stop by here from time to time.

So, what will this blog look like?  I don't know for sure.  But have you ever said, "I'm just thinking out loud"?  Well, sometimes I find my thoughts leaking out in an audible fashion.  So, I guess that would be "talking out loud" wouldn't it?

Maybe that is what this will look like.  This may be a somewhat less polished and more spur of the moment blog.  I plan to try to mimic some blogging approaches from some folks that I follow and that will allow me to update much more frequently and be much more timely.

We will just have to see where this goes.  After all, I will just be talking out loud.

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