He's got a great "work ethic"

All my life I have lived with a strong desire to be seen as someone who is worthy of his wages.  Most guys my age were raised by dads who worked hard and spent their entire careers with the same company.  That is my case.  After dad got out of the Air Force and married mom, and then he spent his entire career with "the phone company."  And I can count on one hand the number of days he missed work in his entire career.  And I would even have a few fingers left over!  Now that man had a strong work ethic.

I don't think I can ever live up to that.

But I have been thinking about a few other "ethics".  What if there was a "husband ethic"?  What if there was a "father ethic"?  How would I stack up against the measure of a good husband or good father?

Well, most of my work as a father is done.  Both of my children are grown and on their own.  I still have some fathering duties to do as you are never really done as a parent, are you?  And my "grandfathering" is just getting started.

I am still a husband.  And I plan to stay a husband as long as Cathy will have me.  We are enjoying the good years that we have looked forward to our whole lives.  And we are looking forward to the days of retirement where we can travel and enjoy more time together.  I just don't think you ever really retire as a husband or father.

But what about the next generation of men that are just starting their husband and father years?  I think if there is one message that I could deliver to them is that they (or we) need to devote the same level of energy and effort into our roles as husbands and fathers that we devote to our role as employee. 

But it isn't all that easy.  Sometimes we see ourselves simply as "money machines".  We see ourselves as income producers and we think that is our primary function as a man.  Sadly, I think many times we miss the boat here.  And if you ask us if that is how we see ourselves, we may not agree or say that we see ourselves that way.  But our actions don't always line up with our intentions.  We don't mean to ignore our primary roles.  We just get caught up in the day to day activities of getting up and going off to work and bringing home a paycheck.  And we are too tired to be a great husband or great father because we have devoted all our energy to the work place.  Great work ethic.  Not so great husband ethic or father ethic.

Hopefully some wives and mothers will chime in here and comment.  I would be willing to bet that most of them are more concerned about how we "work" with them and our children than how we perform at the office and how much money we bring home.  Ladies, am I right here?

I am a very fortunate man.  I have been blessed with a great role model in my dad and my father-in-law.  They successfully balanced all three of these roles.  They even manged to be active leaders in their local churches for most of their lives.  I try every day to live up to those examples.

But I am back to thinking about that next generation.  I have a son and I have a son-in-law.  My kids have friends that are married and starting families.  I have great friends who have married children.  Some have secular jobs.  Some have jobs as pastor in a local church.  My prayer for them is that they will take on their role as husband and father with the same vigor that they approach their job or their ministry. 

As for me.  I will take the Apostle Paul's words slightly out of context.

"Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already been made perfect, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me."

Like I said, it may be slightly out of context.  But you get the point that I am still working at it.

And after all, I am just talking out loud.